You win some. You lose some. That’s one of those life lessons I’ve been teaching my kids.
We just finished a very important and crucial election and some people aren’t handling the results very well. There are
protests
riots in many cities. College students needed to take some time off to
“grieve.” I’m pretty sure there are plenty of adults who took some
time off of work as well. If you voted for Hillary Clinton I can
understand why you would be upset. Losing is hard. It’s terrible. But
… it’s part of life. I believe that many of these millennials aren’t
properly taught how to handle losing and it’s unfortunate.
I wanted to start teaching my kids at a very young age that losing is
something that’s going to happen from time to time. In an election.
In sports. In anything. Losing is sometimes inevitable. In an
election or in a sports game only one person/team is going to win.
There’s a chance the one you were routing for isn’t going to be the
winner. Knowing the person you voted for or the team you were cheering
on lost can be very upsetting and even devastating but it’s
unavoidable. It is what it is. Although, being defeated
can be good because it teaches us to try harder for the next time.
I remember when youth sports teams started handing out trophies to
everyone just for participating. My son has a few from baseball. If
everyone is given a trophy it teaches kids they have nothing to work
for. If you are going to get rewarded, even for not doing the best,
then what’s the point of trying? You showed up and played the game,
that’s good enough. That is just a small part of why I believe young
adults are now feeling so entitled.
As a parent, I feel it’s my duty to teach my kids how to be
responsible and why it’s important to work hard in everything they do.
I’m not going to do things for them that I know they can do for
themselves. If they fail I may help them learn how to be better but I
certainly do expect them to try harder and aim to succeed.
When my son started playing baseball he wasn’t very good. That’s the
truth. Every year he gets better because he’s determined to keep
trying. The last season was his best and I’m so proud of how far he has
come. He loves the sport and is willing to try. Sometimes the team
has lost games and sometimes they won. The coaches felt it wasn’t
appropriate to keep score but these kids so desperately wanted to know.
At the end of each game they would ask my husband, the assistant coach,
“what was the score? Did we win?” They wanted to know. They had
every right to know. But these days, the children are taught
it doesn’t matter if you won or lost.
Actually, yes, it does matter. My husband always kept score and he
told my son after the game. Some days my son cheered for their victory
and other times he was disappointed in the defeat. Knowing when they
lost and knowing what was done wrong gave him the knowledge and momentum
to do better in the next game. These kids need to know when they
lose. They need to learn how to try harder and be better. They also
need to know
you don’t always get what you want.
As I was driving my daughter to her dance class last night the song
“You Can’t Always Get What You Want” by the Rolling Stones came on and I
would love if these rioters and college students could hear the
lyrics. No, you can’t always get what you want so instead of crying and
sulking and feeling sorry for yourself accept what is and try harder.
Admit defeat and move on. My kids have already learned this lesson.