My Girl Is 8

I'm a little late with this post but a few weeks ago my baby turned 8 years old.  I keep saying it, but time is flying!

Unfortunately, I had a mandatory meeting at work and that lasted almost 8 hours.  She was so mad at me for leaving and as I sat in the auditorium listening to what I felt was nonsense and unrelated to my job in the cafeteria I felt really guilty about leaving her.  When I gave birth to my son, my firstborn, I became a stay-at-home mom.  It was important to me that I would be at home with my children full-time and not have to leave them in the hands of anyone else.  It's been a great experience and one I'm thankful for.  Getting a job in the cafeteria meant that I could still be home when the kids are home and I love it.  The extra income has helped a lot.  I'm required to have a certain amount of hours of training/meetings each year and this meeting plus the two hour one the day before covered it.  I just hated leaving my daughter on her special day. 

My husband had the day off and took the kids to a place nearby where the kids can jump and slide on inflatables.  I'm glad they had fun while I was away. 

When I came home we met my parents at Old Country Buffet for dinner.  Then we came home to have cake and open presents.  She was pretty excited about all her gifts, which included a Barbie camper that she had asked for. 

We also surprised her with tickets to see Darci Lynne at the fair next month.  If you don't know who Darci Lynne is she is a young ventriloquist who won America's Got Talent.  She's my daughter's favorite on the show.  We saw her at the airport in D.C last March when we were coming back from Disney World.  

I can't believe my girl is 8.  She's really growing up.  She still loves Barbie's and baby dolls.  She has a lot of friends in school.  I see her in the cafeteria surrounded by lots of girls and she's always laughing and joking around with them.  At home she will be asked by friends to play at their houses.  It's been hard for me letting her go but I can't stop her from being the social butterfly that she is.  She's very sweet and super sensitive.  She's also getting ready for her fifth year old dance and loves it so much.  

She's struggled a bit with school but seems so determined to do better this year as a third grader.  I'm so proud of her.  

Here's to an amazing year, Baby Girl!  I love you so much.

Lazy Morning

This week has been back to school, back to a regular routine, and a whole lot of busyness. 

My mornings start by getting the kids ready for school.  Even though they are 8 and 11 years old they still need constant reminders to stay at the table until breakfast is finished and to brush their teeth and take their vitamins.  The morning is go, go, go until they get on the bus.  Then I take the dog for a walk around the neighborhood, do a little of my own exercising downstairs where we have a little home gym set up, and then get my shower.  Then starts some housework until it's time to leave for work.  I put in my three hours in the cafeteria and that has been chaotic.  There were changes made and it's hectic, and it's also going to take time getting back into the groove of everything.  I really like the people I work with, even tough at times there seems to be a bit of drama.  Isn't there always when working with a group of women?  I ignore it the best I can and go about the day.  I try to be energetic, outgoing, and joke around a lot.  I also do my best at doing my job and also offering more help if there's extra time.  But this week it seems like there's no time to even stop and breathe.  It will get better and I still love it.  Then I go home and continue on the housework until the kids get off the bus.  Since it's the first week they haven't had homework yet.  Then I make sure dinner is ready when my husband gets home and the evening is a bit more relaxing ... for now.  Soon the sports and dance will start and the evenings will be as rushed as the mornings are. 

Today, though, I'm taking a break. 

Even though there is laundry in the washing machine and the dishwasher is going, I'm not planning on doing much else today.  I'm sitting here, with the dog at my side, and I'm getting caught up on some writing.  I've been working on a novel and it's going well.  I'm still in the beginning but I know exactly what I want this story to be from the beginning to end.  I sometimes feel guilty about stopping the housework to relax but if I can get a novel complete and published then that could be a little money coming in.  If it works out.  It's not an easy process and certainly not a quick one, but it's a dream I've had for as long as I can remember. 

So today is a lazy day.  A day when I'm going to sit here and relax and write until it's time to go to work.  Then when I get home I may continue on the story.  Last night I made lasagna and the leftovers will be enough for my husband and I.  My dad plans on taking the kids to dinner and a movie tonight.  It's a rainy morning so the dog and I skipped our walk. 

I also need to rest my mind.  There's so much that's been going on in my life lately.  I've been spending a lot of time in prayer lately asking God to change my heart and I can feel those changes taking place but I need to figure out how to process it all.  Maybe I'll save all that for another blog post.  For now, I better get on with my lazy day. 

New School Year 2019-20

It's hard to believe summer vacation is over.  Today we are back to school.  I have a third grader and a sixth grader.  It's amazing how fast these years go by.

This will be my son's last year in elementary school.   Next year he's going into middle school and I'm not looking forward to it.

Today was also my first day as well.  This is the third year working in the cafeteria at their school.  I love it!  It's just three hours each day and it's so much fun. 

The first day was hectic but it was nice getting back into the routine.

Here's to a new school year!

27 Years In Pennsylvania

This month marks 27 years since my parents and I have moved to Pennsylvania from Long Island, New York.  A lot has happened in these 27 years.  I currently feel grateful for my experiences here but in the beginning of the move and many years after I felt so hurt over it.

My brother and sisters are a lot older than I am.  My brother was married and having children while I was still a toddler, my oldest sister was married when I was in second grade and my other sister graduated high school when I was still playing with dolls and using my imagination.  Then I entered junior high and was allowed to wear makeup and hang out with friends at the mall and movies without adult supervision.  I was finally feeling like I was growing up.  I enjoyed school and was getting A's and B's.  My best friend was Merissa, who on the first day of 7th grade looked at me and said, "hey, do you want to be my best friend?"  We spent a lot of time together either at my house or hers or walking around the mall or seeing the latest movie.  It was definitely a great year and I was looking forward to moving up to 8th grade with my friends and then heading to high school and graduate from the same high school my brother and sisters did.  In my mind I thought I was going to stay in the same house until I was ready to leave it.  Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

New York is expensive, money was tight.  My parents put all their money into a business that didn't work out.  My dad, a retired police officer, worked as a car salesman and my mom had her own house cleaning business, but none of that was enough to make ends meet.  My grandparents lived with us and moved to Pennsylvania so my grandma could be close to her sister, my Great Aunt Alice.  After my parents visited them they decided it was best for us to move there too.  It was a much cheaper state.  My parents could sell the house, buy a house here without having a mortgage, still need to work but could relax.  The first family who looked at the house decided to buy it.  So, with my brother-in-law driving the moving van and with me in the backseat of our Oldsmobile Calais with our Boston Terrier we were on our way to our new life in Lancaster, PA.

I hated it.  I absolutely hated it.  We spent a few months in an apartment and I started 8th grade in a middle school filled with snobs.  I did make a handful of friends but everyone looked at me as if I was an alien from another planet.  People weren't so kind to New Yorkers around here.  Some people easily adjust to moving.  I didn't.  Then when we found a house and moved in I had to change school districts.  I hated that too.  Again, I made some friends, but I also experienced many hard things.

It wasn't all that bad but it wasn't what I wanted.  I wanted to be on Long Island with my friends and my family.  I felt robbed.  That led to years of depression and suicidal thoughts.

Now, 27 years later, I focus more on the positives.  I've met a lot of great people here.  If I hadn't lived here I wouldn't have met my husband and we wouldn't have brought our two children into the world.  I do believe they were brought into this world for a reason.  Whatever the reason, God has a plan for them.  If all I went through was only to bring them into the world then I am grateful for the experiences. 

I also realize that being out of Long Island means no beaches but we do have this view of the Susquehanna River. 

These photos were taken while my son and I were hiking together.

I truly believe that life is what we make it.  I wish I could have realized that 27 years ago.  When I go back to Long Island it doesn't feel like my home anymore but it wasn't meant to be my home.  Also, home doesn't have to be the place where you were born.  Anywhere can be made a home.  It's sad to know we aren't close enough to family where my kids can be with their cousins.  That's one of the many things we miss out on.  We have each other though and that's enough.  I'm thankful for that.

We've traveled to many places and many states but when I go back to Long Island I feel a little disgusted as to how run down it's become.  I'm glad I left it.  If I stayed until adulthood I probably would have left it anyway.  A lot of people have.  I only wish that my attitude was different as a teenager here in PA.  I hated it here, refused to see the good in it.  Now at 40 years old I see things differently and with a better perspective.  My only regret now is not having a better attitude from the very beginning of the move.  I can't change the past but I can only be better from here on out.

Thank you God for almost three decades in this beautiful state.  I'm done taking it for granted.